Are you looking for gifts for a 16 year old boy in your life?

In our family, our 16 year old son, Bulldozer, is the child who doesn't know what he wants for Christmas almost every year.

It takes a lot of creativity and visual prompting for ideas to ensure he has a fabulous Christmas.

He has very specific hobbies, passions, and interests.

I am so excited about what he's receiving for Christmas this year! 

If you're needing gift ideas for a 16 year old boy in your life, here's what Bulldozer is receiving!

Gift Ideas for a 16 Year Old Boy

Gale Force Nine Dune Board Game

Bulldozer absolutely loves the Dune movies and he loves board games.

I love that this gift combines two things he loves  and will encourage him to read the entire Dune book series.

The game will also provide fun times with family and friends.

Sports Attire

Bulldozer loves to wear sports attire with his favorite team logos. 

He loves sports and is so proud of his teams.

Sports attire can be so comfortable and sensory friendly, which is always very important for Bulldozer.

The Singer's Musical Theater Anthology Teen's Edition: Tenor with CDs

Bulldozer has become very involved in theater this year.

He has shown a special interest in singing and has asked me for voice lessons.

A vocalist myself, I'm super excited to share this passion with him.

I've chosen this book to use for his voice lessons and have grabbed the CDs to go with it. A digital download option is available. I just prefer CDs.

10 Sessions of Private Dance Lessons and Tap Shoes

One of Bulldozer's two experience gifts this Christmas includes 10 sessions of private dance lessons with the choreographer from the last musical he participated in.

Bulldozer loves to dance and is open to learning anything.

His choreographer mentioned it would be advantageous for Bulldozer to not only learn ballet and jazz, but to also learn tap dancing.

She helped me find the perfect tap shoes for him, which will give him something to open on Christmas. 

I'll put the certificate for the dance lessons in the shoes.

10 Sessions of Acting Lessons and A Young Actor Prepares Book

One of Bulldozer's passion has always been cinema. 

This passion has now extended to acting. He absolutely loved participating in this fall's musical and really shined on stage.

At age 16, this was Bulldozer's first time acting. He wants to learn more.

I am so excited I was able to arrange 10 acting lessons from the acting instructor he worked with throughout the fall.

So that Bulldozer would have something to open and enjoy before the lessons start, I went ahead and ordered him an acting book for high schoolers.

 

Watch

Bulldozer isn't one to carry his cell phone everywhere with him.

He's also not the best at keeping track of time.

I'm hoping this watch will help him in the best ways.

It includes the logo of his favorite football team, so I'm hoping he'll like it.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

As I said before, Bulldozer is very passionate about cinema. 

Godzilla movies are some of his favorites. He's been collecting them for a while. This is one he doesn't have yet.

No one in the family has seen this movie yet, so it will be fun to watch it together.

Backpack Cooler with Containers and Water Bottles

If there's one thing we've learned this fall, it's that theater practices run long and occur often.

Bulldozer needs food and drinks to keep him going, especially when he has long dance rehearsals.

This bag is the perfect size to pack everything he needs.

I've included a couple water bottles and containers as well.

Plants Vs. Zombies Battle for Neighborville Complete Edition for Nintendo Switch and SanDisk 128GB Card

Bulldozer has been asking for this video game for months. 

He really loves the Plants Vs. Zombies games and has several for his Xbox. 

Now he's trying to collect them for his Nintendo Switch.

Knowing he'll most likely need extra memory at some point, I included an SD card with this gift.

Football Cards

Bulldozer enjoys football cards just as much as his brother, though he doesn't have quite as many. 

This year he's asked for a BIG set.

I'm excited to give this set to him.

Bulldozer and his brother spend hours together sorting and having fun with football cards on a daily basis.

LEGO Set

There is never a time when LEGO goes out of fashion for teen boys, or so I've learned. 

Bulldozer loves collecting Marvel and Star Wars sets, especially those that include a lot of characters and lots of figures.

He displays the vehicles in his room on special shelves for all to see.

The LEGO figures are used in a variety of ways.

Backpack with Nintendo Switch Case

Bulldozer's backpack was stolen this summer, while playing ball with his friends at a local park. He looked away for a few seconds and it was gone.

Truth be told, he was in need of a new backpack anyways. He needs something to store music, dance shoes, and more going to and from theater practices.

I absolutely love the backpack we chose. It is so nice!

We are huge fans of Eddie Bauer bags as they last years and in some cases decades. The Switch case is being included to add just a little more fun to the gift, and is also something that is needed.

Santa Gift: Sports Team Jersey

Bulldozer absolutely loves basketball. He has wanted a jersey from his favorite team of his favorite player for quite some time.

He'll be the first in the house to receive a basketball jersey, so it's a pretty big deal.

I love that I'm able to give this to him.

Hadestown Christmas Ornament

Hadestown will always be remembered as Bulldozer's first theater performance. 

He absolutely LOVED his first show in every way. 

This ornament will be placed on our memory tree, so that he can remember the experience every Christmas season from now on.

The ornament is absolutely beautiful!

Christmas Eve Book: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes Book

Bulldozer has always been a huge fan of The Hunger Games books, but has yet to read the prequel.

This year I'm checking this off his list.

I'm hoping that a book that is related to his favorite series will be the perfect read on Christmas Eve night.

The Icelandic Christmas tradition of a new book and chocolates on Christmas Eve is one of my favorites!

Christmas Eve Chocolate: Assorted Dark Lindt Truffles

Bulldozer and I are kindred spirits when it comes to our chocolate preferences. 

He and I LOVE dark chocolate and Lindt truffles.

It only seems fitting to give him this wonderful assorted truffle package to enjoy.

I hope these gift ideas inspire!

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Christmas with teens is so different than it is when little one are running around. 

Do I dare say I like it even better?

I had so much fun shopping for my 17 year old son this year.

My biggest struggle was choosing to stop after I had purchased my 12 gifts of Christmas.

If you're looking for gift ideas for a 17 year old boy in your life, here is what my son is receiving for Christmas this year!

Please keep in mind that I shop clearance and sales all year long, so by no means did I pay full price for anything on this list. 

My rule of thumb is that I don't purchase anything unless it's more than 50% OFF, except for very specific things that never go on sale with that much of a discount (LEGO).

Many of you know that I give 12 Gifts of Christmas to each of my children every season. 

Each gift is from a different category to provide a wide variety of items to open.

The only other items my kids receive are:

• "Santa" Gift (This is unwrapped and on display next to their stockings on Christmas morning.)
• Christmas Eve Book with Chocolate (Icelandic Tradition that helps a ton with anxiety on Christmas Eve)
• New Ornament for Memory Tree
• Stocking Stuffers (Included in another post)

Here is the list of what Dinomite is receiving for Christmas this year!

Gift Ideas for a 17 Year Old Boy

Outdoor Screen for Projector with Speakers

Friends are everything right now to Dinomite.

This outdoor screen projector with speakers provides more opportunities for fun times (outside of the house) where no one has to worry about being excluded.

One of Dinomite's favorite things to do is watch movies with his friends.

He received a projector last Christmas and loves it! Dinomite often watches football games on the wall in his bedroom.

Now he has so many more options to enjoy!

Scuba Diving Lessons & Basic Certification

Dinomite's largest gift this year is the experience of lessons to receive his scuba diving license!

He has been working towards this goal for quite some time.

First he learned to swim well.

Then he became a certified life guard through the American Red Cross (Mom's prerequisite to scuba diving lessons).

Now he competes on the local club swim team to build his strength and endurance.

I'm so excited to give him this experience, which is schedule for later this winter.

I love that this is a gift I am able to pay for in installments.

If you have a child interested in scuba diving, look up local listings to find a place that works for you!

Sports Attire

Dinomite is a HUGE sports fan. 

His favorite teams include:

• NFL San Francisco 49ers
• NHL San Jose Sharks
• NBA Golden State Warriors
• MLB San Francisco Giants
• College Michigan Wolverines

Each year I try to add to his sports attire collection, focusing on a specific team. 

Dinomite loves wearing sports attire to celebrate his favorite teams. 

He's found it to be a great way to engage and strike up a conversation with others.

This year Dinomite is receiving more hockey themed attire, especially after enjoying his first live NHL game while we were on vacation.

Backpack Cooler with Containers and Water Bottle

Dinomite is so busy during the week! It's rare that he's home on a weeknight for dinner, let alone anything else.

Due to all the exercise Dinomite receives with swimming and more, he struggles to eat enough food and maintain his weight. Right now he's eating 3500 to 4000 calories a day.

A large backpack cooler with containers and another water bottle is a must for him!

This way he can pack up ALL of his diet-friendly food for the afternoon and evening, or when traveling to meets and scuba diving lessons on the weekends.

Watch

Dinomite had the watch that's highlighted above a few years back and LOVED it. He wore it until the band started coming apart due to just how much he was wearing it and accidentally putting it through the wash.

Since that time he's continued to ask for the same watch again.

I'm excited to give it to him again.

Dinomite has found a watch to be so helpful in places where he doesn't bring his cell phone, like practices etc.

Batman Arkham Trilogy for Nintendo Switch and SanDisk 128 GB Card

Dinomite has always been a HUGE Batman fan! 

When I asked what video game he wanted this year, this was it!

Apparently it's a pretty big deal.

Since Dinomite was running low on Nintendo Switch storage, I've included an SD card to ensure playing goes smoothly.

Bathrobe

Dinomite had a bathrobe years ago and loved it, until he grew out of it. 

When he saw this bathrobe, he HAD to have it.

We live in very old farm house that becomes quite cold in the winter. 

A bathrobe adds an extra level of heat and comfort while relaxing.

Of course, Dinomite chose a sports team themed bathrobe. Lol.

Football Cards

Dinomite is a huge collector of football cards. I believe he has thousands. There are very specific cards he looks for at this point.

I can always depend on his wish list to include what seems like very random packs of cards, but to him, they're important additions to his collection.

This year's football cards are from before he was born, which I find quite comical. 

He is so excited about the possibility of receiving them.

DUNE LEGO Set

Dinomite is very passionate about the Dune Series. He has read all of the books and prequels. 

We already own both Dune movies, that he saw in theaters.

When Dinomite saw the LEGO Ornithopter set, he HAD to have it.

I can't wait to see his face when he opens this gift!

Fish Tank Filter and Accessories

Dinomite has had a fish tank for a couple years now, but it's been struggling. No matter what we do, the inside of the tank is green.

We've tried multiple things to help the tank along. My final idea has been to try a new filter. 

I went to PetSmart, explaining all the issues we've been having. They recommended a Biomax filter and accessories.

Apparently it's an incredible filter that does amazing things. Here's hoping it does the trick!

Update: Dinomite's old filter broke just this week, so he received this gift early. I can now say, this filter is AMAZING and is doing wonders for his tank!

The Illiad and The Odyssey

Dinomite absolutely loves history. 

As we've studied ancient civilizations through the American Revolution, he has pointed out a few books he'd like to read. 

Two of these books were The Illiad and The Odyssey. 

I can't help but give the books as a pair.

Besides being a huge history lover, Dinomite loves reading classic literature, so this gift fits the bill in both categories.

Fast & Furious 8 Movie Collection

Dinomite has always loved cars. It's no wonder he loves the Fast & Furious Series.

We have the newer movies, but not the first eight. 

Our home is located in the middle of nowhere in the mountains, where there is no Wi-Fi, so we still enjoy DVDs and Blu-ray disks.

It will be so much fun watching them all in order instead of piecing story lines together when we catch one of the movies half way through on cable. Lol.

Santa Gift: Workout Bench with Kettle Bell and Dumbbells

Dinomite struggles with hypermobility to the point that he can dislocate his shoulders on a regular basis if he doesn't work out enough. Thankfully Dinomite loves to strength train!

He has asked for a workout bench to add to our at-home gym as well as the next level of free weights he needs to step things up to the next level.

Dinomite prefers dumbbells and kettle bells over bench pressing because of his joint struggles. 

Smaller weights with more repetitions is always safest for him.

If you're looking for another strength training gift for a teenage boy in your life, Dinomite loves the book: The Men's Health Big Book of Exercises. He uses it on a regular basis. 

There are so many choices and workout options!

Swimming Christmas Ornament

I am so excited about Dinomite's Christmas ornament for our memory tree this year!

It is absolutely beautiful.

The ornament is personalized to reflect him.

When it arrived in the mail, I gasped with excitement and awe.

Christmas Eve Book: Percy Jackson and and the Olympians Book 6

Dinomite has always been a fan of the Percy Jackson series.

This fall he learned there were a few new books available and added them to his wish list. 

I love that this book will provide familiarity and excitement on Christmas Eve to help with anxieties.

Christmas Eve Chocolates: Non-Dairy Lindt Truffles

We are firm believers in the Icelandic tradition of giving a book and chocolates on Christmas Eve.

Dinomite doesn't tolerate dairy, so these are the perfect alternative.

And let me tell you, they are so good!

What are you giving the 17 year old boy in your life this holiday season?

If you enjoyed this post, you may also like the resources below.

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The 12 Gifts of Christmas for Children and Teens

There are so many different thoughts and opinions about how many gifts caregivers should or shouldn't give their children and teens during the holiday season.

As a minimalist, I am not one who likes giving or receiving gifts without meaning and purpose.

As a minimalist, I live in a very small home, so there is no room for a lot of extra stuff.

At the same time I LOVE the magic of the Christmas season.

I LOVE to give special gifts to those I love.

I LOVE to wake up Christmas morning with gifts overflowing from underneath the tree.

How does one strike a balance between minimalism and holiday commercialism, especially with a husband and four children?

I have found the greatest joy in giving what I call, "The 12 Gifts of Christmas" for children and teens.

This name was inspired by, "The 12 Days of Christmas" song that we all love.

Our Family's Current Christmas Gift Giving Circumstances

At this time in our lives, no one in our family receives gifts from extended family or friends.

Some grandparents send money, which typically goes towards holiday vacation experiences, but that is all.

Each person in our home receives:

• 1 Small gift from each sibling on Christmas Eve Morning
• 1 Book, Chocolate, and Christmas Ornament for our Memory Tree on Christmas Eve Night
• Santa Gift
• Christmas Stocking
• 12 Gifts of Christmas

You can read more about our Christmas traditions in the post below.

Family Christmas Tradition Ideas

Everyone in our family keeps and updates Amazon wish lists year round.

This allows me to shop for the best deals and discounts year round, saving as much money as possible.

Gifts may seem expensive, but it is rare that I ever buy anything that isn't 50% OFF or more.

We do not go out and buy extra "stuff" throughout the year. 

If one of us needs items like shoes or clothing, we'll purchase what is needed on clearance.

If something breaks and needs to be replaced quickly, then we will do so.

Otherwise, the holiday season is when we go all out.

Everyone in the house knows that gifts are received on holidays and birthdays only, so they're extra special.

Here's what we do!

I love that no matter what our budget is, we can still find something for every category.

The gifts are meaningful, used, and loved.

And, they take up very little room in our home!

The Twelve Gifts of Christmas for Children and Teens

1. Something to Wear 

Each year our kids receive clothing. 

This gift idea was introduced to our children with the Scandinavian tradition of the Yule or Christmas Cat.

In Scandinavian countries you must receive an item of clothing for Christmas or you will be eaten by the Yule Cat! 

There's something about the Yule Cat that makes receiving clothing at Christmas so much more entertaining. Lol.

Now that we have teens, they love receiving clothing for Christmas.

Since they're not really growing anymore, we don't do much school shopping. Receiving new clothes at Christmas is always welcomed.

My husband and I don't buy clothes, except for at Christmas and Easter, unless a clothing item is destroyed or we can find what we need at the local thrift store.

It's always my goal to give a full outfit as a gift to each person in the home.

Shopping year round and finding incredible clearance deals helps make this happen.

If I'm not able to put together an entire outfit, a single item of clothing works.

There are so many options:

• Socks/Stockings
• Tops
• Bottoms
• Dresses
• Suits
• Underclothing
• Hats
• Shoes/Boots
• Outerwear
• Bathing Suits
• Clothing Accessories

There's something for every budget!

2. Something Fancy

The holiday season is a time of year where so many are dressing up and looking their best. I love to support that when gift giving.

Everyone loves to feel special!

I've given so many fancy things over the years. 

Here are some ideas:

• Make Up
• Hair Accessories & Tools
• Nail Accessories & Tools
• Lotions & Skin Products,
• Jewelry
• Watches
• Ties
• Suits
• Dress Clothing and Shoes
• Shavers & Kits
• Perfumes & Colognes

I love that boys and girls alike can enjoy fancy items!

3. Something to Read

The holiday season is the only time of year that we purchase books. Most often we just borrow books from our local library.

Everyone in the family gets so excited to receive a new book for Christmas. 

My kids particularly like being introduced to a new series, so they can continue to enjoy reading for as long as possible.

There are so many different types of books out there to choose from to fit the needs of everyone on your holiday list.

Even if people aren't big readers, different types of books can work.

Here are some ideas to consider:

• Recipe Books
• Visual Encyclopedias
• Coloring Books
• Crossword Puzzle Books
• Joke Books
• Magazine Subscriptions
• Trivia Books
• Travel Books
• Novels/Graphic Novels
• Picture Books
• Comic Books
• Arts and Crafts Instruction Books

If you have someone on your list who struggles with reading due to delays or disabilities, consider giving an audiobook. 

4. Something to Watch

I don't know about you, but I have the fondest memories of receiving new movies on Christmas and enjoying them through the holiday break.

Another favorite memory is receiving movie theater tickets to enjoy with family or friends.

Today life is a bit different with streaming services and fewer theaters, but you can always find something to give to someone to watch.

Here are a few ideas:

• DVDs/Blu-ray Discs: Movies & Shows
• Subscriptions to Streaming Services
• Movie Theater Tickets or Season Passes
• Drive-in Tickets
• Concert Tickets or Season Passes
• Sporting Event Tickets
• Subscription to NFL+ Premium or ESPN+
• Theater Tickets or Season Passes

Again, there's something for every budget here! I love membership options that I can pay throughout the entire year, instead of in one lump sum.

5. Something to Play

During the holiday season, especially when there's no school, its' always beneficial for everyone in the family to have something new to play with.

Obviously play items change over time as children get older, but there's still something for everyone.

Here are some ideas:

• Toys
• Board Games
• Card Games
• Video Games
• Gaming Systems
• Computers
• Musical Instruments
• Sports Equipment
• Outdoor Activity Sets

Remember that play looks different for each child and teen.

6. Something to Build or Create

Such gratification comes when a project is started and completed! 

Gifts that invite building and creation can be so much fun.

They also provide something to do during the holiday break and possibly some extra time with a loved one who may assist.

Here are some examples of building gifts we've given in the past:

• LEGO Sets
• Model Kits
• Building Kits
• Science Kits
• Scrapbooking Kits
• Arts and Craft Kits
• Sewing Kits
• Gardening Kits
• Puzzles
• Home Renovation Projects
• Tool Kits & Building Supplies

Be on the look out for kit subscriptions. They can be wonderful to receive throughout the year!

7. Something to Promote Family Bonding

The holiday season is a time to create memories and traditions that will be remembered for years to come.

I love giving an item or experience that everyone can enjoy as a family.

Here are some ideas:

• Board Games
• Card Games
• Family Movie Nights
• Family Memberships to Kid-Friendly Locations (Zoo, Science Museum, Pool, etc.)
• Restaurant Experiences
• Escape Room Experiences
• Sports Climbing Experiences
• Classes for the Entire Family
• Tickets to a Special Events
• Season Passes to a Theme Park or Other Location
• Vacation Packages

We understand some children and teens do not have family or those that can participate in bonding time. For that reason, we've also mentioned that this gift idea can work with friends.

8. Something to Promote Healthy Living

I find it so important to support my children and teens in healthy living in the areas of  physical, emotional, spiritual, and educational fitness.

Giving them a gift that promotes wellness AND is something they will enjoy, is one of the best ways I can show my support.

There are so many gift ideas that fall under this category!

• Exercise Equipment
• Sports Equipment
• Sports Lessons or Camps
• Dance Attire or Shoes
• Dance Lessons or Camps
• Skating Attire or Shoes
• Skating Lessons or Camps
• Membership to a Gym or Pool
• Camping Equipment or Trip
• Water Bottle
• Just Dance Video Game

I love watching my my kids enjoy these Christmas gifts. They're the gifts that keep on giving and keep them active!

9. Something to Promote Personal Hobbies 

Every child and teen has at least one hobby or passion.

I can vividly remember each of my kids' passions and hobbies at different phases of life. There are so many fond memories.

Though I could never provide a list that includes every hobby and passion, here are some that are popular in my home and with friends right now, or have been in the past.

• Football Cards
• Pokémon Cards
• Dungeons and Dragons
• Drawing
• Arts and Crafts
• Singing
• Dancing
• Acting
• Swimming
• Cars
• Dinosaurs
• Barbies
• Trains
• Insects

Once you know the hobby or passion, it's fairly easy to find a gift to give that matches it.

Don't hesitate to ask your child's or teen's help with this gift, to ensure it's exactly what they're wanting or needing.

10. Something to Promote Community and Identity

It is so important for the health and wellbeing of a child and teen to feel like they belong in some group or organization. 

They long to be someone who is respected and recognized by others for who they are.

Each year, I try to support my kids in this endeavor.

Groups do not have to be official. Anything can count really.

I remember the year my boys started wearing attire related to their favorite NFL teams. 

So many strangers would come up to them and start a conversation about football.

They became official fans of their favorite teams and that meant something.

Bulldozer discovered theater this year and found that this is where his people are.

It's always best to follow your child or teen's lead when it comes to what type of groups and organizations they want to participate in.

Here are some gift ideas to go along with this theme:

• Team or other Group Attire and Accessories
• Sports, Dance, Theater, Music, Art, 4-H Camps, etc.
• Private or Group Lessons related to chosen Interest
• Cooking or Baking Classes

I love how these type of gifts build self-confidence!

11. Something to Use in the Kitchen or Related to Food

It is a long standing tradition in our house to receive a gift during the holiday season related to food or that can be used in the kitchen.

There are so many options when it comes to this category of gift!

Here are some gift ideas that have been enjoyed at our house in the past.

• Specialty Pots & Pans
• Waffle Maker
• Recipe Books
• Baking Equipment and Accessories
• Lunchboxes
• Popcorn Assortment
• Popcorn Seasonings
• Hot Sauce Sampler
• Maple Syrup Assortment
• Knives Set

Every child and teen uses the kitchen and/or enjoys food, so you really can't go wrong here.

There has never been a Christmas when a kitchen/food themed gift hasn't gone over well.

12. Something for the Bedroom/Personal Space 

Whether a child or teen shares are room, or has their own, it's always fun to help them create a personal space that is their own.

Each year I try to give each one of my kids a gift that does this.

Examples of gifts that have been loved in our house include:

• Photo Frames and Collages
• Jewelry Boxes
• White Boards for Drawing
• Fish Tanks
• Bedding Sets
• Wall Art and Decor
• Lap Desks

There are so many other options!

If you decide that one of the 12 gift ideas doesn't really fit your family consider the following:

• Something to Listen To
• Something to Learn

There are years when we have to switch out some ideas for others based on the needs of our kids.

As you can see, it's possible to embrace minimalism and enjoy the 12 gifts of Christmas.

So many of the gift ideas are experiences and/or items that work for everyday life.

The 12 gifts of Christmas promote physical, spiritual, emotional, and educational wellness.

They provide so many opportunities to develop life skills.

I don't usually have to worry about making room for things, because I don't buy items I don't have room for in our home.

It's my hope that this list inspires others who may be struggling with gift ideas this holiday season.

If you liked this post, you may also enjoy the resources below.

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Today, I was once again reminded how a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder responds to pain and sickness.

I was at the doctor's office with Princess.

She had explained very casually to the doctor that one of her ears felt plugged and numb. The other ear had just begun to hurt.

The doctor looked into her ears.

"If my ears looked like your ears, I'd be curled up in my bed sobbing from the pain."

Princess giggled.

Children and teens with Reactive Attachment Disorder feel pain and sickness so differently than their typical peers.

Reactive Attachment Disorder: Pain and Sickness

How Does a Child or Teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder Respond to Pain and Sickness?

No child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder responds to pain and sickness in the same way.

The response will be based on the type of trauma endured and the type of Reactive Attachment Disorder that is present.

What are the 2 Types of Reactive Attachment Disorder?

The start of pain or sickness may be a huge trigger and solicit a very big response in the form of unsafe behaviors.

A child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder may feel like she is going to die, the minute she feels pain or sickness, because of past trauma.

In some cases, a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder may not show any signs of sickness or pain at all.

Pain or sickness in a child with Reactive Attachment Disorder can cause unsafe behaviors to lessen or disappear completely.

Where a typical child or teen would be absolutely miserable, the child with Reactive Attachment Disorder is pleasant and seemingly content.

A typical child or teen often wants to rest until feeling better. 

When feeling pain, the typical child often stops what she's doing.

The child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder may not feel the need to rest, until the body literally can't not rest.

Pain often does not stop a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder from functioning, unless it is extreme and severe. Even then sometimes, a child or teen with RAD will try to keep going.

Sickness or pain may be the only instances in which a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder allow the caregiver to take care of her.

At the same time, sickness or pain, may cause a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder to push a caregiver even further away. 

The child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder may blame and target the caregiver for the pain or sickness she feels, due to past trauma that is unresolved.

Why Does a Child or Teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder Respond to Pain and Sickness Differently than Typical Peers?

A child with Reactive Attachment Disorder has endured significant trauma. 

While going through that trauma, the brain and body developed coping strategies in order to survive.

Many of the coping strategies used were not healthy.

In most cases, regarding trauma in the first 18 months of life, it benefited the infant or toddler not to respond to pain or sickness in order to stay safe.

In cases where an infant or toddler was being physically abused, medically neglected, or experiencing medical trauma, the brain changed to acclimate to the unsafe situations.

These brain changes affected the entire body's response to sickness and pain.

There are some neglected infants and toddlers who simply learned that communicating needs through crying and speaking did nothing.

So they stopped communicating needs.

Once again, the developing brain changed when sent these messages. 

Changes became normal.

This same scenario has played out over and over again throughout the years.

In order to survive trauma Princess experienced before she came to our family through adoption, she taught herself not to feel pain.

She automatically blocks out pain and sickness, whenever she feels them. 

As a teenager, her body and mind are just beginning to work together in these situations.

It's taken this long for her to trust that it's okay to express that she's hurt or not feeling well.

How Do I Help a Child or Teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder when Feeling Pain or Sickness?

A helpful response to pain or sickness will depend on the caregiver's knowledge of past trauma, the child or teen's healing process, and the type of Reactive Attachment Disorder that is present.

Every child and teen is different.

Most often finding the most helpful response will take a lot of trial and error.

In our home, I have found the best response to sickness is a balance of teaching life skills that promote independence and a constant presence to show my daughters that I am always there for them.

Over time we have worked together to help my girls understand what their bodies are trying to communicate and how to respond in a way that helps the body heal.

This has been HARD work.

Once my girls had a basic understanding of their body and could communicate needs, we put together a "Sick Kit."

A Sick Kit For Kids

This sick kit helps my girls know that they are safe when sick.

When developmentally appropriate, I've taught my girls how to use various items in their sick kit independently.

This empowers them and helps them understand they do not have to rely on others, who may not follow through with taking care of their needs.

I teach them that if items in their sick kit aren't helping them feel better after a few days, then it's time to call the doctor, who will add more items to their kit to help them heal.

During all of this, I remain by their side when sick. 

Instead of leaving them alone to rest in their room, my girls are in the living room or where I can see them at all times.

Sick time is a time of bonding, in a way that isn't possible in other situations.

I embrace the time together, knowing that as soon as my girls are feeling better, they will begin to push me away again.

150+ Ways Children and Teens with RAD Push Others Away

When it comes to pain, I've learned the best way to help my girls is to encourage them to feel the pain, express strong emotions safely, and stay by their side as often as possible.

We work on co and self-regulation a lot during these times.

How to Stay Calm During a Reactive Attachment Disorder Fit

Pain can often bring casts, braces, crutches, and more. 

Please be aware that these items can become weapons and ways for a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder to injure herself.

My youngest was in a boot for six weeks after breaking three bones in her foot. During that time, a lot of new dents and marks on our walls and doors appeared.

At times she would take out her anger and frustration about wearing a boot out on the walls and doors, using her foot in the boot.

The same daughter broke her arm and ended up in a cast. She hated that cast so much that she worked on taking it off by herself every night at bedtime until she managed to do it. 

Her arm, underneath the cast, was a mess from the loosening process.

The doctor was absolutely shocked. 

How Can I Know My Child or Teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder Has a Dangerously High Tolerance for Pain or Sickness?

When an infant or toddler's brain responds to trauma in order to survive, it does not have full control of how the brain changes.

Shutting down pain receptors causes other complications within the body.

Temperature, hunger, and toileting recognition and regulation are all linked together with pain recognition and regulation through interoception, the 8th sense.

It's extremely difficult for the brain to only shut down one of those processes, and not the others.

If you have a child or teen who struggles with understanding and recognizing safety and appropriate practices regarding temperature, hunger, and/or toileting, then there's a great chance your child or teen also struggles with understanding and recognizing when she is sick or in pain.

Understanding the 8th sense, interoception, is extremely important for caregivers raising children who have suffered trauma.

When a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder does not feel hot or cold, hunger or thirst, and sickness or pain like typical peers, unsafe behaviors can occur, resulting in consequences for caregivers.

A child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder doesn't learn the natural consequences of not wearing a coat, skipping a meal, or being in pain, therefore the caregiver can become liable for whatever happens to the child.

A Caregiver's Fears When Raising a Child with RAD

I am so thankful for a doctor who has been consistent through some of the toughest years of raising my daughters with Reactive Attachment Disorder.

The doctor understands Princess does not feel pain until it's extreme and severe.

We work together to help my daughter, communicating openly with my daughter present about struggles she's having.

Create a safety plan with doctors, therapists, teachers, coaches, etc. for your child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder when it comes to pain, sickness, and injuries.

When everyone is on the same page, keeping documentation along the way, families can feel safe.

Caring for a child or teen with Reactive Attachment Disorder when sick or in pain can be extremely challenging.

Remember you are never alone in this journey. 

You can do this!

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Hanukkah is a very important holiday to our family.

It holds a special place in our hearts.

There are many ways to celebrate the holiday.

Here is how we celebrate!

Hanukkah: How We Celebrate

When the kids were preschoolers, we introduced them to holidays around the world. 

We created beautiful materials that were culturally sensitive to ensure that our children would learn to love and respect those of the Jewish faith.

Montessori-inspired Hanukkah Printable Pack I

Little did we know that a few years later, our oldest adopted daughter would learn she's part Jewish after taking a an Ancestry DNA test. 

Since that time we have continued to learn about and celebrate Hanukkah out of respect for our daughter. 

We created another fabulous resource for all to enjoy.

Montessori-inspired Hanukkah Printable Pack II

Once our children understood Hanukkah and the significance of the holiday to those in the Jewish faith, we began to celebrate as a family.

This was incredibly important to us, as it was a way to support our adopted daughter and her heritage.

8 Nights of Hanukkah

During the eight nights of Hanukkah we take time to celebrate in a variety of ways.

We light our Hanukkah Menorah while listening to Ma'oz Tzur sung by Leslie Odom Jr. and Nicolette Robinson.

When we're on the go, we bring our Electric Silver Hanukkah Menorah to ensure we can still light candles each night.

Games of Dreidel occur at least one night during our celebration.

Madelaine Solid Premium Chocolate Traditional Hanukkah Gold Coins are a favorite treat enjoyed by all.

Children's Books About Hanukkah

When the kids were young, we enjoyed reading books about Hanukkah each night. 

Below is a list of some of our favorites.

The Story of Hanukkah Book

Hanukkah Bear

Celebrate Hanukkah

Elmo's Little Dreidel

Hershel and the Hanukkah Goblins

Happy Hanukkah, Curious George

Shmelf the Hanukkah Elf

Latke, the Lucky Dog

Even now, years later, my kids still remember these books!

Hanukkah Dinner

One of my kids' favorite aspects of celebrating Hanukkah is our delicious Hanukkah feast.

The kids enjoy:

• Brisket
• Latkes
• Homemade Applesauce
• Challah Bread with Homemade Jam
• Sufganiyots

As the kids get older we add more and more delicious foods to our Hanukkah celebration, spacing things out over the eight days.

Hanukkah Gift Ideas

When celebrating Hanukkah, we try to stick to gifts that embrace and celebrate Jewish culture, to honor our daughter.

Here are some gifts we've given in the past that have been loved and used.

Hanukkah Foam Toy Menorah

This is a perfect gift for a little one who isn't quite ready for a real menorah. 

We gave this to our youngest daughter. She did not want to put it away after the holiday season.

I loved how she was able to participate in festivities safely in a way that was appropriate for her development.

Hanukkah Dreidel Pop It

Who knew there was a dreidel pop it?! 

This was a great sensory gift to help our youngest keep her fingers busy during Hanukkah festivities and traditions.

It's well made and has lasted for years.

Love, Lights, Hanukkah! Movie

This is one of our favorite Hanukkah themed Hallmark movies. We watch it every year.

I love how it compares Hanukkah and Christmas with a respect for both!

Double Holiday Movie

This movie shares so many fabulous ideas on how to celebrate Hanukkah! 

I love that there is an idea presented for each day of the holiday.

Modern Jewish Baker Cookbook

Jewish baked goods are so yummy! If you know someone loves baking and they love celebrating Hanukkah (and other Jewish 

Sababa Cookbook

In my opinion, Jewish cuisine is absolutely delicious. This cookbook has so many wonderful recipes to try. It's one of my favorites!

Smithsonian History Visual Dictionary

This is the perfect Hanukkah gift for the history lover in your life. Not only does it cover the history of the Jewish people, but the history of the world.

Gourmet Olive Oil Sampler

Oil is a very important part of the celebration of Hanukkah. This gift of oils is so enjoyable. I have enjoyed all the flavor they add to mealtime.

World Religions: The Great Faiths Explored and Explained

This book is a great way to introduce the Jewish faith in comparison to other religions around the world. 

I am so thankful for all of the memories our family has made celebrating Hanukkah. 

These memories have been so special to our daughter, as they are yet another way that we show we accept her.

Happy Hanukkah to all of those celebrating!

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